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A kisser full of humble pie

by | Mar 29, 2019 | Newspaper Columns | 0 comments

The Mueller Report brings back memories of an insult that boomeranged. I insulted Conrad. He was a bleak, unpopular drinker in my father’s saloon. My insult haunts me.

The taproom was so tiny we heard all conversations without eavesdropping. We know, for instance, that everyone disliked Conrad. They happily made him a butt of their jokes. A target of their disdain. They belittled him, scoffed at and scorned him.

I was 21 and about to emigrate to New Zealand. Tending a crowded bar on my final night I made my farewell. “I will really, really miss all you guys. But you, Conrad, I won’t miss for one second. I’ll never miss you. I’ll be happy you are out of my sight.”

Conrad scowled. He tossed down his drink and slunk from the taproom. The place fell silent. I expected laughs, but none came. Drinkers peered into their beer or rolled their eyes toward the ceiling.

In their minds, I had crossed a line. I had struck a low blow. My insult did not inspire them to fall in love with Conrad. But it caused them to say – with their silence – “Whoa. You’ve gone too far, you cocky young man.”

I felt shame. Feel it to this day. I was smushed in the face with humble pie.

Fast forward to the Mueller Report. Especially to the lead up. For two years his critics insulted Trump in a thousand ways. They made him their punching bag.

They pummeled him with contempt. Made him the laughing stock of late-night shows. They labelled him a traitor. A crooked tax-evader. Accused him of treason. Claimed he was an illegitimate president. Called him a puppet of Putin. Called him a spy. Called him a despicable liar of the first order.

They accused members of his family of treasonous behavior. They sneered at his remarks. Scoffed at his explanations. They delighted in voicing their dreams that he would be frog-marched from the White House. They declared a thousand times that he was certain to be impeached, disgraced.

As the Wall Street Journal put it, “No unverified rumor was too salacious and no anonymous tip was too outlandish to print.”

And then, WHOMP! The Mueller Report arrived. For a moment the enemies fell silent. Some zipped their lips. Others back-pedalled, changed the subject. Others began to defend their behavior, looking pathetic in their bravado.

Suddenly CNN’s audience shrunk by 50 percent for a few shows. By 30 percent for some prime-time shows. CNN blamed everything but CNN. Suddenly MSNBC’s attack dog, Rachel Maddow, lost 20 percent of her viewers. Meanwhile, Trump’s numbers jumped five percent in the Rasmussen poll.

Most of these viewers will probably slink back. And many of those polled will change their minds on Trump. Many, however, will remember the shame they felt. For piling on. For joining in the effort to humiliate the president. Some will ever remember the embarrassment. For buying in to the lies and leaps to judgement.

For many, this will be a game stopper. It won’t cause them to fall in love with Trump. No more than my insults inspired our taproom crowd to fall in love with Conrad.

However, I believe millions will reflect on the storm of insult that swept over this nation. They will reflect on who created and perpetuated the national degradation of this president. They will reflect on who cheered-on the lynch mob that foamed at the mouth in hopes he would fall.

In those reflections, I believe many will feel Trump’s enemies went too far with their attacks. Crossed a line. Struck too many low blows. Insulted our highest office. And mis-treated the man who occupies it.

Further polls and ratings will tell us more. My hunch may be utterly wrong. Still, I have a feeling that many in this country have just experienced their Conrad Moment.

From Tom…as in Morgan.

Find Tom on Facebook. You can write to Tom at tomasinmorgan@yahoo.com.