We will have to come up with a name for these times. I nominate “Weird”. The Age of Weird. Everywhere you turn you find weird. I wish we could print that name in crazy colors. Within a fringe of black, for mourning.

I started on a novel a few years ago. But set it aside. Because the story was too implausible. By the middle of the tale, the plot had most of the people on earth fixated on one thing. It was a noise, a sort of buzz that everyone heard.

Nah. Didn’t work. Because, well, it was too weird. It was chin-deep in science fiction. It was asking readers to believe something too bizarre. Everyone everywhere would focus on one phenomenon? Right.

Today readers would feel the opposite. They would scoff that the novel was a copycat of reality. An attempt to match the weirdness of our virus crisis. How’re you gonna draw them into that plot, after they’ve seen today?

There once was a funny feature on radio called “Chicken-man”. In the intro a crazy woman screeched “He’s everywhere! He’s everywhere!”

Welcome to this virus. It’s everywhere! We are characters in science fiction. And, of course, it ain’t funny. It is weird.
It has swept tens of millions of cars from the streets of cities and towns around the world. Turned Fifth Avenue, the Champs-Elysees, Chicago’s Miracle Mile, London’s Strand into mute canyons. Weird.

I saw a video tour of many of San Francisco’s downtown streets. Not one person, not a car. Weird.

A few hundred million people suddenly work from home. The children of the world attend school from home. Half the people of the world on lockdown. More probably on the way. Weird.

The Queen is in hiding. Her son, the prince, infected. Her prime minister stricken. Leaders of various countries are down with this virus. Cosseted leaders and royalty don’t get sick. This is weird.

Orchestras are silenced. Stadia emptied. Theaters battened down. Millions of small businesses shuttered. Big Sports canceled. Weird.

Our President and his crisis team appear on prime time every night. Welcomed by millions. Yet spurned by others who hate him. And chopped by some television networks. Big majority of Americans grant him good marks for his and his team’s handling of the mess. Yet Big Media churn out venomous hit jobs. Probably 90 percent of their coverage of his efforts is negative. Weird.

Media headline attacks on him from political and entertainment celebrities. If there is vitriol in their remarks, all the more chance media will run with them.

I picture the captain at the helm in a fierce storm. It threatens to capsize the ship. He tries to rouse his crew. Assures them they are all in the fight together.

“Count me out,” cries First Mate Pelosi. “Screw you!” screams Bosun Schumer. Second Mate Schiff curls his nose. “You’re on your own, skipper. We’re busy working on a mutiny.” Weird.

In the middle of this crisis the Saudis and Russians decide to slug it out over oil. Brawling, they flood the world markets. Which destabilizes the world with plunging oil prices.

Coming to a gas station near you – 99-cent gas. But you can’t buy any, because you don’t drive anywhere. You want to drive up and down your driveway all day just to be able to boast you bought such cheap gas.

It is crazy that this should happen at this moment, sponsored by the Chinese Virus. Which you are not supposed to call the Chinese Virus. Because this will offend the communists who hid its dangers from the world. And they happen to be Chinese. Crazy? No, it is downright weird.

Meanwhile, election approaches. That is not weird. But the fact that Joe Biden leads the Democrat pack? That is weird in capital letters underscored.

He is a decent man, likeable to many. He has served his country well. But there simply is no way to hide that he has deteriorated mentally. No way to hide it because you can watch the videos, see for yourself.

In one of his addresses to the nation he says “And, uh and, and in addition to that, uh, and in addition to that, we have to, uh, make sure that we, uh, we are in a position that we are, well, lemme, lemme go to a second thing. I’ve spoken enough on that.”

Weird! Try sticking that in a novel.

I don’t wish to make fun of the man. No more than I want people to make fun of my dear brother, who is pawing his way through the mental porridge of Alzheimer’s. And no, I am not trying to diagnose Joe Biden. But it is clear that his mental processes no longer are. It is cruel for people to prop up this man before the nation and pretend he can work as our chief executive. That they insist on doing so, that they pretend he is totally compos mentis, is weirdly weird.

Hell, that we have a president whose vocabulary seems limited to a few hundred words. That is weird.

Here is a weird experience that may leave you scratching your head. Check YouTube for videos of Joe Biden from 20 years ago. Or further back. You will see a man in full. One who spoke clearly and powerfully. Who rattled off ideas. Who easily seized and kept control of situations.

Then watch videos of him today. He is like a ghost of Biden past. And he could become your president? Weird.

Then watch old videos of Donald Trump. Watch him with David Letterman a few decades ago. You will see that he had a vocabulary! He did! He did not resort to “Amazing,” “Incredible”, “Fantastic”. He did not start three sentences, finish none, and start three more. He actually spoke in compound sentences and expressed his thoughts clearly, in logical order. Unscripted.

And he smiled a lot.

Now all of that, is genuinely weird.

Both these men have declined in their abilities to express themselves. As have, or will, most of us after 70 years. One of them seems further down this decline than the other. Just my opinion. You have yours, for sure. It would be weird if you did not.

I wish you safe haven in this gathering storm. Stay safe. Don’t try anything weird.

From Tom…as in Morgan.
Find Tom at tomasinmorgan.com. You can write to Tom at tomasinmorgan@yahoo.com.